Gaslighting yourself: when you start doubting your own reality

Gaslighting doesn’t only happen in relationships.

Sometimes, we do it to ourselves.

It sounds like:

“I’m overreacting.”

“It wasn’t that bad.”

“It’s my fault for feeling this way.”

Self-gaslighting often begins as a survival strategy.

We learn to ignore our instincts to avoid conflict, rejection, or disappointment. Over time, this coping mechanism becomes a habit.

From a psychological perspective, repeatedly questioning our own thoughts and emotions leads to:

lower self-esteem

increased anxiety

loss of self-trust

difficulty making decisions

In the workplace, self-gaslighting often shows up as:

“Maybe I’m just not good enough.”

“Perhaps I’m too sensitive.”

“Everyone else seems to handle this better than I do.”

But your feelings don’t need permission to be valid.

And your experience doesn’t become invalid just because it doesn’t fit someone else’s narrative.

Awareness is the first step.

Pausing to ask:

“What am I really feeling — and why am I trying to dismiss it?”

Self-trust isn’t built through doubt.

It’s built through listening.